(As usual, I type strong words that come into my mind but have nowhere else to go. So here’s a quick accumulation because My Notes are cramming up my phone memory. Last year but always a part of me. Changes cannot be undone, only grown into and grown out of.)
Easily disappointed and easily bruised.
Not a good pair.
I am nothing but a
Funeral procession running in my mind.
I am not trying to make you forget her,
I am trying to make you remember me.
Born of weak flesh and a weaker resolve.
How do I justify withholding information from someone else?
We kill each other.
We care more about paper than blood.
To be able to love,
Is to be able to lose.
We keep memories
We keep our distance.
Swallowing the words, I love you no more.
Criminals of conscience.
Dreaming of fears and how it used to be.
I speak truths.
Scripture decorates my tongue.
Verses embroidered on my skin.
How do you love somebody so much that your heart is eaten up alive, and your skin burns from not having them there.
Imagine that I am zoning out – thinking about everything and nothing at all. My eyes gazing into the typical distance of contemplation, and my body is simply a physical vessel.
Ghost pregnancy; will power.
But he doesn’t hit me. Then I realised that he doesn’t have to.
Are all reasons of the same weight?
I write, in hopes that I will be able to decipher the part of myself I know not of in the future.